Being Married to a Teacher

What It's Like Being Married to a Teacher

When my now-husband and I first started dating, he shared something really special with me that will stay with me forever. Months before our paths crossed, he had written out a list of qualities that he valued in himself and what he was looking for in a partner. He told me that he had made a promise to himself that he would be patient with his next relationship, for he hoped that the next person he dated would be his wife one day. (Cue the butterflies in my stomach - how was this was coming from a 21 year-old?!) But I also knew after our first date that he was the man I had been hoping for & dreaming of. I had taken a similar path a couple months earlier after reading the book The Resolution for Women by Priscilla Shirer, making several commitments to myself for personal & spiritual growth. And then there we were on one of our first dates and my new boyfriend sheepishly & sweetly shared his hopes & dreams with me. On the note was one particular thing that made us both smile, "sweet & kind hearted, loves & serves others, like an elementary school teacher." He beamed at me then, because I had just started a job as a preschool fitness coach and was falling in love with the Early Childhood field almost as fast as I was falling in love with him. That was one of many moments that felt like magic, like our lives had truly been brought together at the perfect time. 

It's a precious memory to me, but I look back now and shake my head & laugh. If only we knew what we were getting into! Not just with the road to marriage, but the shared journey of me becoming an educator. Having a servant-heart sounds wonderful on paper & all, but actually living it out is challenging. It's a daily walk that I am still working on. The journey was uncomfortable to say the least. It took many years of working jobs that I was passionate about but were not financially supportive (Preschool Coach, Camp Counselor, Youth Specialist, Substitute Teacher) and long periods of separation (we spent two summers apart due to his internship & my summer camp position) and those circumstances really took a toll on our relationship. When he started his career and I finally landed my first classroom teaching gig, we hardly saw each other. I was a Pre-K teacher at a private preschool with after school care, so my hours were 8:30 am - 6:30 pm the first semester and 7:30 am - 5:30 pm the next semester. Add my commute & gym time, and I was gone at least 12 hours a day. It was rough, but it was life. 

When I finally landed my "dream job" in an incredible school district in our hometown, he shared my joy & reaffirmed his support, knowing that public school education was a whole new world that I would have to dive head-first into to learn. That was my first year in First Grade, and it was truly a breakthrough that lifted our relationship up to a new level. I spent many late evenings at school that first year, but I was happy & energized. He was an apprentice with his new company, and we were both thriving thanks to the support of family, friends, and our church fellowship groups. We got engaged the spring of that year, and married a few months later during the summer, before school started up again. Side note: our lives literally revolve around my teaching schedule (summer & holiday breaks.) Having a wedding on August 1st & honeymooning for a week thereafter was still cutting it close to the "Back to School" season. But alas, here we are at the end of another summer, celebrating our Wedding Anniversary during my last week of freedom.

We have moved 4 times in the past 5 years together, and therefore I have moved classrooms 4 times. My husband has had to come up to my school every year to help me move in & set up. He helps me take boxes upon boxes from our garage to the classroom, and some years has helped me move furniture down the hall when I've had to switch classrooms. He has diligently worked to help me set up my classrooms, rearranging & cleaning out desks (literally scraping Barbie stickers off the inside of desks & lockers), hanging things on the walls, and has patiently curbed my anxiety many times with his efficient, focused, "get-er-done" work ethic. I don't think he knew what he was getting into, but he's been entirely on-board every step of the way. I can't imagine a more supportive & understanding partner.

Let's just say that as the husband of a teacher, he has had ample opportunity to "love his wife like Christ loves His Church." He has shown patience in my most frantic moments, grace when I am bitter, frustrated, and angry, and love when I come home broken down, defeated, and feeling despair beyond hope. He has literally talked me off the ledge when I didn't think I could do it anymore. He has talked with me through my doubts & insecurities as an educator. He has listened & responded when I complain & rant, and he shares in my happiness when I gush about my day and babble on describing every hair on my students' heads (even though he has told me to choose a new adjective besides "cute" to use when describing my students, because if he has to hear, "Oh my goshhhhh so & so did the CUTEST thing today," one more time........ :-))

At the end of every day, he is my rock. Just thinking about all that he has done for me & my career makes my heart swell with appreciation & love. I could never fully express my gratitude to him through words, so all I can do is serve him back through his own love-language. I'm thankful that we have a lifetime ahead of us for that. 

Note from a former Firstie of mine. "Meree" = Married :-)

What's the worst thing about being married to a teacher?

Hubs: Having to hear how cuuuuuuute all your kids are ALL the time. 

What's the best thing about being married to a teacher?

Hubs: Having you home for summer. We get to spend a lot more time together then.

Cassie Dixon

Believer | Educator | Dreamer